On Monday, a local Indian couple, the Patels, admitted to themselves and the world, that their 17 year-old son isn’t very smart.

“Let me just say this first: we have two daughters and they are both very smart!” said Ms. Patel.  Most notably, their oldest daughter, Anaya won both the New York State Spelling Bee and the Geography Bee.  Their middle daughter, Vara, taught herself calculus in Ninth grade and was a National Merit Semifinalist.

“But Vishnu just isn’t as smart as his sisters.  Even after the SAT prep class he only got the 97th percentile.  Both his sisters were 99!”  When pressed, the Patels conceded that Vishnu has been admitted into college. “But it’s a state school,” qualified Ms. Patel, “All of our friends’ children are going to private schools.”  When asked to speak on the issue, Dr. Patel stated: “Vishnu is good at soccer. But we have resigned ourselves to the fact that he will never support us in our old age.”